


He Was Done

by sandersonsister



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Depression, M/M, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-09
Updated: 2013-10-15
Packaged: 2017-12-10 20:56:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 6,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/790077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandersonsister/pseuds/sandersonsister
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Stiles attempts the unthinkable, the pack has to contemplate how they're treating him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Wolf, and I am not making any money off of this story.

Stiles was tired. Tired of a best friend that didn’t seem to care anymore. Tired of a father that didn’t trust him (though, he had to admit, his father had a good reason). Tired of caring for people who didn’t give a damn about him (Note: Lydia, Derek, everyone else on the planet…).

And he was done.

Done with all of it.

He was just human. A puny human that couldn’t help with anything besides looking things up on a computer. And now, the pack even went to Danny or Lydia before they came to him. He was supposed to be “research guy”! That was _his_ place in the pack – the one thing he was good at!

But that was taken from him too.

He should have expected it. He didn’t know how he didn’t expect it.

Yesterday was his birthday. The day before that was the anniversary of his mother’s death. Two things that he usually had company for. Not a lot of company – most people found him to annoying to be around for that – but some company, none the less.

Scott always, _always_ , came over the day before his birthday. He would sit with Stiles, watch movies, sit quietly while Stiles obsessed with making him mother’s favorite recipes.  Then, Scott would stay the night. The next day along with Stiles dad, would do everything possible to make sure Stiles had an awesome birthday.

Scott didn’t show up this year.

His dad was working overtime at the Sheriffs office, barely finding the time to text a quick _Happy Birthday_ around ten o’clock that morning.

He didn’t hear from anyone else.

Not Scott, or Lydia, or Allison (not that he really expected it after the whole trying to kill them all thing), or Danny, Jackson, Isaac, Erica, Boyd…

He hadn’t heard from Derek in weeks. He didn’t know why it hurt him so much not to hear from him now. He just knew that even thinking of Derek was enough to push a blade of ice into his chest.

He was tired.

Stiles, despite being a good student, had somehow let he grades drop. Well, it wasn’t somehow. It was the fact that for months he had been neglecting his schoolwork, focusing on the pack, on researching whatever strange thing came along next.

Of course, he couldn’t tell his father that. In his fathers eyes, his son had somehow become the kid that was barely passing school, the kid that got him fired, the kid that lied to him at every opportunity, and the kid that had a restraining order against him from another classmate.

In short, Stiles had become the kid his father never wanted.

And Stiles understood it. He knew how much he had changes since he made that horrible decision to drag Scott in the woods with him to look for a dead body. He knew he messed up. And kept messing up.

Stiles let out a deep sigh, clenching the bottle in his hand. He felt the lid digging into his skin – cutting him. Not that it mattered. Not now.

He swallowed hard, his eyes landing on his phone on the floor next to him. Maybe once more… maybe it would be different this time?

**_Scott, I need you to call me._ **

****

He waited. Maybe this time it would be different. Maybe this time something would happen… unlike the others.

The phone beeped, making the pill bottle crash to the floor. Stiles grabbed it quickly sliding open the message. It wasn’t a call, but it was a response… maybe…

**_Dude, im w/ allison. Have plans w/ Isaac later. C u @ skool mon._ **

****

Stiles let the phone crash to the floor, not caring anymore if it got broken. What did it matter anyway?

He bent over slowly, slowly taking the lid off of the bottle of sleeping pills. It didn’t matter. None of it mattered.

Except…

His dad. He couldn’t leave him alone. Who knew what he would do? Work himself to death. Eat fast food for every meal, every day. Someone needed to watch him.

But that someone didn’t need to be him.

Decision made, Stiles tipped the bottle back, letting the contents fall into his mouth. Then he grabbed the beer on his nightstand. They always tell you not to drink on medication, right?

He swallowed the contents, feeling slightly pleased with himself. Maybe this was finally something he wouldn’t be able to screw up.

Slowly, he reached for his phone.

**_Take care of my dad for me._ **

 


	2. Derek

This was a nightmare. It had to be. There was no way he… no way he saw what he did. It just wasn’t possible. He wasn’t here. He couldn’t be.

But he knew he was. He knew by the smell, the smell of sickness, of cleaning supplies, of death.

It just couldn’t be real…

**

Derek almost didn’t look at his phone. There were only a few people that could have been texting him, and, to put it bluntly, he didn’t really care about what any of them had to say at the moment.

But, for some reason, he picked up his phone.

 **1 new message – Stiles**.

Derek felt his eyes narrow. He hadn’t talked to the boy in months, ever since – well, since he realized how much of a _bad idea_ it was being around the kid.

Because that’s what Stiles was, a kid.

The problem was, the wolf didn’t quite see it like that.

So Derek stayed as far away from the _kid_ as possible.

He wasn’t stupid, he could smell the lust coming off of the kid whenever he saw him train with the others. He could smell the attraction whenever he walked in the room – hear the way the _kids_ heart sped up whenever they spoke.

Derek didn’t want any part of it. No matter what the wolf wanted.

So he began to push the boy away, instead going to Lydia when he needed research – which she was good at. Not as thorough as Stiles, but she was good enough. And, when she needed help getting the information he needed, she went to Danny.

Derek scowled at the thought. He hadn’t wanted to other teen involved – actually, he wasn’t opposed to killing the teen if he got in Derek’s way. But Lydia had made a good argument, explaining how accomplished the kid was with a computer, as well as being close to Jackson… and, she had said, he was going to find out eventually. His best friend had died, then come back from the dead, and then left.

Danny already knew something was going on, it was just a matter of time before he figured out what.

He was another one that smelled whenever Derek was around.

Although, with him, Derek could just growl a little and flash his eyes and the kid would instantly reek of fear instead.

A much better smell, if you asked him.

Derek closed his eyes briefly, then hit the message on his phone. Might as well get it over with – it could be important.

But, if it was some dog joke, Derek was going to rip his throat out.

**_Take care of my dad for me._ **

****

Derek stared down at the message, trying to make sense of the words while his wolf whimpered in panic.

**_Take care of my dad for me._ **

Derek was out of the house, into his car, and on the road before he could even think about it. His wolf was getting louder by the second, wanting out, wanting to get to Stiles. Derek felt his claws break free, and his teeth sharpen.

He was overreacting. Stiles probably just meant… well, Derek wasn’t sure what he meant, but he had to be overreacting. Derek would get to Stiles house, Stiles would be fine, and Derek would get to slam the kid into a wall. Again.

Derek slammed on the brakes outside of the Stilinski house, his tires squealing. He jumped from the car, straining to hear the boy.

He couldn’t hear anything.

The wolf whined louder, pushing Derek to go in, to make sure, check on his mate. Find him.

Then Derek heard it. The sound of a heartbeat… a dangerously slow heartbeat.

**

Derek couldn’t remember much after that. Breaking in through Stiles locked (locked!) window. Seeing the boy lying on the floor, his skin pale. A bottle of pills – empty. Beer on the floor.

He knows he called for an ambulance. He knows the dispatcher was trying to talk to him. He didn’t remember saying anything. Just that he needed help. His friend…

His friend.

The Sheriff had shown up right after the ambulance. Demanding to see his son, wanting answers from Derek. Threatening Derek.

Derek didn’t have any answers for him.

The Sheriff had run into the house, breaking down into tears as soon as he saw his son. As soon as he saw his sons room.

He went with Stiles in the ambulance. Told Derek to follow them.

 

He did. He couldn’t remember driving.

He remembered watching as they rushed Stiles behind closed doors, remembered Scott’s mother telling the Sheriff he couldn’t go in. Remembered collapsing in a chair as his wolf howled, making Derek shake in anguish.

The Sheriff was next to him now, not saying anything. He seemed to have aged thirty years in the last hour. Derek could understand that.

Melissa McCall had come out only a few minutes ago, tears lining her own face. She said she was going to call Scott.

Derek didn’t know how that would help. Shouldn’t she be helping?

“I saw the window,” the Sheriff finally said, his voice hoarse, “they said you found him. You…”

“Not soon enough,” Derek replied, voice low, “should have been faster.”

The Sheriff turned to him, his eyes red. “If you hadn’t found him, he would have been dead. I wasn’t scheduled off until early tomorrow. How – why were you – “

Derek knew what the Sheriff wanted. Knew the only answer he could give.

 

Slowly, Derek slid this phone out of his pocket, the message still open on the screen.

**_Take care of my dad for me._ **

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

Isaac knew something was wrong when Derek didn’t come home. Even when Derek wanted nothing to do with them, when he was furious at them, he came home at night to watch over them.

So, when it was two o’clock in the morning and he wasn’t home yet, Isaac got worried.

But he didn’t know what to do. Scott wouldn’t care, Boyd didn’t care about anything at the moment, and Erica would just tell him that Derek was a grown wolf that could take care of himself.

He refused to call Jackson, Lydia, or Danny. Nothing was worth that.

And Stiles wasn’t answering his phone. Isaac had tried calling him for the last two hours, but he hadn’t gotten a response. He knew Stiles didn’t really like him, but he thought he would have at least seen what he wanted.

Finally, Isaac decided to send a text to Scott. Maybe he had seen him after Isaac left his house earlier that night.

**_Have you seen Derek? He hasn’t come in 2nite._ **

Maybe something else had happened, and Derek, being Derek, had decided to try and go after whatever had done it himself.

**_Dude 2 in morning! Don’t know where he is._ **

Isaac winced, he knew Scott wouldn’t be any help.

**_Srry. Stiles wont answer me._ **

Isaac tried to call Derek’s phone once again, for the tenth time in the last hour, only to have it go straight to voicemail. That’s nice. So, that left a couple of options. 1.) Whatever Derek went after destroyed his phone. 2.) The phone died. 3.) Derek was perfectly fine and had turned his phone off. Probably to avoid the many calls he was getting from Isaac.

Isaac hoped it was the second one. If it was the third, he was going to be pissed.

 

 

***

 

Scott was lying on his bed, his eyes closed, and his phone attached to his ear. Isaac had woken him up to look for Derek of all people, and now Stiles wasn’t answering his damn phone.

Scott knew Stiles – he wasn’t a heavy sleeper. Which meant he was ignoring him.

Just because he couldn’t hang out with him earlier didn’t mean Stiles had to ignore him! He already had plans! Yeah, he knew he and Stiles hadn’t been hanging out much lately, but Scott was busy! With the whole werewolf thing, and Allison, and Isaac…

Scott sighed as the phone went to voicemail once again, throwing it down on the bed. He didn’t even know why he was bothering – he was sure Derek was fine. But Isaac was worried, so Scott was trying to help him, since they were friends…

Where was Stiles? If anyone knew where Derek was, it would probably be him. They hung out together, right?

 

***

 

When Danny was finally told about the “secret”, he knew there was a possibility that one day, one of the “pack” would end up getting hurt, and there was a possibility that the other members wouldn’t know anything about it. So, he hacked into the hospital computer, as well as the Sheriffs station computer, and placed “red flags” in the system. He tagged each persons name – including family members. So, if something did happen, an alert would be sent to him. It was just a way for him to feel somewhat useful.

Which was why he woke up at six o’clock Saturday morning, checked his phone, and froze.

Stiles was in the hospital. Overdose.

Stiles had a report filed in the Sheriffs station. Suicide attempt.

Danny jumped over to his computer, pulling up all reports he could find. Sleeping pills – pills prescribed to John Stilinski. The Sheriffs department called by Derek Hale.

Danny scrambled to his phone, dread welling in his chest.

**_Everyone get over to mine ASAP._ **

****

***

 

Lydia was, admittedly, the smartest of the “pack”. She saw what was happening, even if the others didn’t. Scott had three priorities in his life; Allison, Isaac, and his mother. His supposed best friend didn’t make the list. Derek had been keeping Stiles away as much as possible, going around the boy every chance he got. Jackson, Lydia, and Danny – well, Stiles had never been part of their group, and, pack or not, he wasn’t now. So he didn’t come to them. Even when he felt like he had nothing left.

Isaac, Erica, and Boyd were Derek’s. No matter how much they argued, they would side with him.

Allison was Scotts. Scott had already decided Stiles wasn’t worth the effort.

So really, this shouldn’t have shocked her.

But it did.

She had seen the way Stiles had begun to close himself off more and more. Noticed that he didn’t talk as much (something that would have, at one point, made her laugh in joy), had seen him walk down the school hallways with his shoulders hunched. She had noticed Derek asking her to look things up – things that would have taken Stiles half the time to find.

They had pushed him out of the pack without even realizing it.

“You’re wrong,” Scott snapped, already on his feet with his fists clenched. “something else must be going on. Stiles wouldn’t –“

“Stiles did,” Lydia snapped, not wanting to put up with Scotts idiocy today. “A full bottle of sleeping pills. Stiles isn’t stupid – he knew what he was doing.”

“There has to be something else!” Scott snarled, turning on her with flashing eyes. Jackson was in front of her before she could blink, growling at the other boy to back off. “Maybe he and Derek went after something, and whatever it was found out, and they-“

“And they what?” Lydia said sarcastically, rolling her perfectly lined eyes, “Forced him to swallow thirty pills?”

“You don’t know!”

“When was the last time you talked to your best friend, Scott?” Lydia snarled, losing what little patience she had. “If you paid any attention at all, you would know Derek hasn’t spoken to Stiles in months. If something else was going on, something supernatural, Stiles would be the last to know!”

Scott snapped his mouth closed, a confused expression overtaking his features. “But he texted me last night! Why would he do that?” He demanded, triumph on his features.

“What did he say?” Danny asked softly, a sad look already in his eye. He had a feeling he knew what was coming, and it wasn’t going to be good for the other boy.

“Uh,” Scott looked startled, pulling his phone out of his pocket. He scrolled through his messages quickly, “I really need you to call me.”

Erica groaned loudly, her head hitting the side of the couch. “Please tell me you called him.”

Scott looked sheepish, shooting a quick look at Isaac. “I was with Allison, and then I had plans with I-“

“Did you send him something?” Lydia demanded.

“I told him I would see him Monday!” Scott snapped back defensively.

There was a stunned silence before Lydia stood, pushing her chair back loudly and grabbing her purse. “You, McCall, are an idiot.”

“Where are you going?” Scott demanded.

“Where do you think? Stiles was with me at the hospital. It’s time for me to return the favor.”

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

Stiles woke to the sound of beeping. He knew what that meant.

It meant he had failed. He shouldn’t be surprised about this.

He carefully pulled his eyes open, wincing at the bright lights. His dad was in the chair beside him, asleep. His mouth was hanging open, his had bent so his chin was against his chest. Even from where hew as laying, Stiles could see the dark circles under his fathers eyes. He needed the sleep.

Stiles eyes drifted around the room, taking in the various flowers/cards/gifts. He felt a scowl cross his face. Of course, now people pay attention. He didn’t want their pity.

A shadow fell over his bed, and Stiles looked into the doorway to see an angry werewolf staring down at him, eyes red. Stiles narrowed his own eyes in return.

“What were you thinking?” Derek growled out, taking another step into the room. Stiles noticed that though angry, Derek kept his tone quieter than usual. Obviously, Stiles wasn’t the only one that believed his dad needed sleep.

“What are you doing here?” Stiles hissed, “You haven’t bothered the last couple of months, why bother now?”

Derek let out a loud growl, making John snap awake, his hand automatically going to his eyes. “Derek? What’s going on?”

Derek’s eyes returned to normal instantly, and Stiles was shocked to see a flash of regret cross the usually stoic face. “Stiles is awake.”

“Wh-“ John jumped to his feet, peering over on the bed. Stiles tried to smile at his dad, but the Sheriff just grabbed his sons hand, a tear falling down his face. “Derek, get the doctor. Stiles-“

Derek disappeared instantly, though John didn’t seem to notice. “You scared the hell out of me, kid.”

Stiles felt the regret, the shame, wash over him in an instant. “Dad – I’m sorry, I-“

John shook his head, giving his son a watery smile. “Not now. There’ll be plenty of time for that – weekly time. Maybe more. Depends on what the doctor says.”

Stiles felt his heart drop. “Wha-“

“Mr. Stilinksi,” a man in a long, white coat said, coming swiftly into the room, “you gave us a scare.”

Stiles ignored him, staring at his dad, “Dad, what are you talking about? Weekly-“

“We will get to that soon,” The doctor cut in, moving to the side of Stiles bed. “Sheriff, if you don’t mind keeping Mr. Hale company for a moment, I just need to check a couple of things.”

Stiles shook his head in confusion. Why would Derek still be here? And why would his dad want to keep Derek company? “Wh-“

“I’ll be back in a couple of minutes,” John said quickly, squeezing his sons hand and moving toward the door.

Stiles stared after him, panicked. “Now, Mr. Stilinski…”

 

***

 

Therapy. And not just weekly. At the moment, Stiles was to have appointments every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from 3:00 – 4:00. And, to make matters worse, he couldn’t even omit anything – because his dad had decided it would just be easier for him to see the school counselor. Yeah. Ms. Morrell.

But Stiles didn’t have to worry about that just yet. No, because they refused to release him from the hospital.

And everyone kept showing up. Everyday, he was told the waiting room was filled with people to see him. And, everyday, he refused. He didn’t want to see them. Not now. Now that they felt sorry for him. The hadn’t cared before.

Derek didn’t give him an option. Derek was there everyday, along with his dad, sitting in his room. While his dad tried to talk to him, Derek sat in silence, his eyes just staring at Stiles.

Even when Stiles dad had to leave, to go to work, Derek stayed. If Stiles did something Derek didn’t approve of (argue with the doctor, refuse to eat the food they gave him – hospital food was gross!) Derek would glare, and his eyes would flash.

Stiles was smart enough not to push. Even if he did resent the wolf. A bit. A lot. Why was he here, again?

But, Stiles found himself liking the fact that Derek was there everyday. He didn’t push him. He didn’t even try to talk. Stiles grew to like the silence, like the fact he could rely on the other man.

He just knew that it was going to hurt all the more when Derek decided he wasn’t worth the effort, again, and leave him, again.

And this time, Stiles knew he wouldn’t be able to come back from it.  


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey, just thought I would let you know that I have started posting this story on fanfiction.net - my username is different on that site. So if you see it posted by NessaRose89, it's still me! Thanks!

“Stiles? Why don’t we try something different today? Talk to me about the day Scott was turned.”

Stiles bit back a groan, sliding down further on the couch. It didn’t matter that he had been released from the hospital and had yet to return to school. No, Miss Morrell decided to just come and see him until he could make it to their sessions. First, she asked about why he didn’t want to see the pack. Two days ago, it was his mother. Today – well, the woman sure did like to pry, didn’t she?

“What about it?” Stiles snapped, a scowl forming on his face. 

She wasn’t fazed what so ever. She just stared at him with those cool eyes. Cool judgy eyes. “It happened right before school started, correct? How?”

“What do you mean how?” Stiles asked back, sarcasm dripping from his voice, “A wolf bit him! A wolf with glowing red eyes!”

“Yes,” Miss Morrell agreed, her lips twitching slightly. “But how did that come about? Why was Scott bitten?”

Oh, if that wasn’t a loaded question. Stiles instantly found himself plunged into a sea of guilt – this was all his fault. Yes, he had lost his best friend because of all the supernatural stuff… but he was the reason it happened in the first place. It was all on him.

“Stiles?”

“Dad got a call,” Stiles said, his voice coming out in a broken whisper. He stared at the floor, not wanting to see the look on her face. Not wanting her to see… “they found a body in the woods. Half a body.”

“Laura Hale?”

“I didn’t know that. Not then. I went to Scotts – I asked,” Stiles broke off, his breathing becoming labored. 

“Take your time, Stiles. It’s alright – “

“It isn’t alright!” Stiles cried, exploding off of the couch and shaking his head wildly. “It’s all my fault! If I hadn’t listened in on that damn call, we never would have gone in the woods! Scott wouldn’t have been bitten, and none of this would have happened!”

“None of what?”

“This!” Stiles snapped, gesturing around himself wildly. Why was she asking this question? Wasn’t it obvious? “Scott had asthma – he never would have made first line! And Allison wouldn’t have noticed him – and Jackson would have just ignored us like usual! We wouldn’t have had to deal with Peter – or Jackson – or any of…” He broke off, suddenly realizing tears were streaming down his face. It was his fault. All of it. “My dad wouldn’t hate me! I wouldn’t have met Derek. It wouldn’t have mattered that he didn’t – and I wouldn’t have known Isaac, or Erica, or Boyd. Scott and I would have just hung around and played video games. I wouldn’t…”

Miss Morrell moved forward, placing a gentle hand on Stiles arm. “You wouldn’t what, Stiles?”

Stiles moved slowly, falling back onto the sofa. He moved his legs up, wrapping his arms around his knees. “Alone. I wouldn’t be alone.”


	6. Chapter 6

Stiles thought he had made it perfectly clear that he didn’t want to see them. The house was completely surrounded by mountain ash, he got his class schedule changed – the only reason he hadn’t taken all AP classes in the first place was so he could be with them, no point now – and he always made sure to ignore them in the halls.

So why was Allison sitting on his bed and Lydia at his desk when he got home from his latest torture session with Morrell?

“Finally,” Lydia snapped, tossing strawberry blonde curls over her shoulder, “I thought she might have decided to lock you up and we’d have to rescue you.”

Stiles ignored the comment, dumping his backpack onto the floor beside the bed. “What are you two doing here?” He asked, his voice sounding dead even to him. He saw them exchange a look – at one point, it would have worried him. Now? Now he just wanted them to go away.

“We are worried about you,” Allison told him gently, placing a light hand on his arm.

Stiles jerked away from the touch as if it burned him. In a way, it did. She couldn’t just come in here and be nice to him – not now. “I’m fine. Is that it?”

“No, that isn’t it,” Lydia said harshly, standing from the chair and coming over to stand right in front of Stiles. He took an instinctive step back. “Everyone is miserable, yourself included.”

“I’m fine,” Stiles told her firmly, trying to ignore the conversation replaying in his head from half an hour ago.

_"You’re ignoring them,” Miss Morrell said softly, tilting her head to the side._

_Stiles refused to look at her, “I’m not ignoring them. I’m just… moving on.”_

_“Stiles, you cannot truly move on until you face whatever it is you’re leaving behind,” She sighed, “ I think the real problem is that you know if you try to speak to them, you are afraid you’ll realize the truth.”_

_Stiles scoffed, rolling his eyes, “And what truth is that?”_

_“That you don’t want to leave them at all.”_

“You are not fine! Not that I don’t like you being in my classes – I told you to take them in the first place – but you aren’t you! Stiles, I just spent the entire day with you and you didn’t say a word. In any class. That is not fine!”

“Scott misses you,” Allison cut in quickly, not giving Stiles a chance to respond, “You’re like his brother-“

“Brother?!” Stiles snapped, turning to face her with an incredulous expression on his face, “Ever since you came to town, I might as well be invisible! I did everything I possible could to help him, to help all of them, and what do I get? Nothing! No thank you, no one asking me how I am. I get called when you need help figuring something out, and now that doesn’t even happen! I’m not even good enough for that! Danny is better at it then I am!” Stiles chuckled darkly at the startled expressions on the girls faces, “the only thing I ever got was held hostage by Gerard and he kicked the shit out of me. And no one even asked what the hell happened – everyone was to worried about Jackson to care about that. Erica and Boyd were there, and they never even mentioned it. My dad doesn’t trust me, the rest of you act like I don’t even fucking exist. Don’t say Scott misses me, he hasn’t been around me in months! He’s too busy with you and Isaac to give a shit about me! So no Lydia, you’re right, I’m not fine.”

“Stiles-“ Allison said, her eyes beginning to leak tears.

“Get out. Both of you.” Neither girl argued, both just grabbed their things and slowly walked out the door, closing it softly behind them.

Stiles sank down onto the bed, burying his face into his hands.

 

***

 

Lydia stepped out of Stiles house, her throat burning. She knew Stiles was upset, obviously clinically depressed, but to actually hear him say some of those things…

“Did you get it?” Allison asked as they walked toward the car, tear tracks on her face.

Lydia slid her hand into her purse, gently pulling out the tape recorder and pressing the stop button. “Every word.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter today - really short. I was having a lot of trouble with this part. Sorry!

When Derek heard Stiles voice his hand jerked to the point that he actually spelt his drink. Stiles couldn’t be there – Derek would have known if Stiles was there – but that was definitely the other boys voice. 

Without thinking about it, Derek moved through the house to the family room, where the betas were crowded around Lydia and Allison. “What is going on?” He demanded. 

Lydia turned cold eyes to him, eyebrows raised. “Stiles is upset and they need to know why.”

That was when Derek caught sight of the devise in Lydia’s hand. His felt his stomach – and his mouth – drop. “You recorded him?”

Lydia merely rolled her eyes, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “We needed to-“

“No!” Derek snapped, moving forward to grab the recorder from the girl. Jackson moved forward instantly, eyes hard. Derek sent his beta a warning glare. “You recorded him. You recorded a guy who doesn’t trust us and intend to play it. A private conversation.”

Lydia clenched her jaw, “Stiles would do the same thing!”

“Stiles doesn’t have any boundaries!” Derek exploded, eyes flashing as he took another step forward. Jackson held his ground, but Isaac turned his head, whimpering. “You cant betray him like that! Haven’t we done that enough?!”

Allison shifted uncomfortably, her eyes flickering to the recorder, “We were only – “

“I want to know!” Scott cut in, his own eyes flashing angrily at Derek. “Stiles is my best friend! I’m closer to him than you are, so it’s my decision!” 

Derek stared at the boy in front of him, not believing the words coming out of his mouth. “Your decision?! It should be Stiles decision!”

Scott shook his head, jaw set stubbornly. “We are listening to that recording.”

Derek stared at the younger man. How could anyone be that… stupid? And Lydia was supposed to be the smart one. “Do whatever you want. But I’m not having any part of it.” He turned sharply, making his way to the door. He didn’t even make it all the way out before Lydia pressed the button, once again releasing Stiles broken voice. 

“Brother?! Ever since you came to town, I might as well be invisible! I did everything I possible could to help him, to help all of them, and what do I get? Nothing!” Derek tried to block the voice, tried to ignore the sound of his mate in pain. He couldn’t listen to this. He couldn’t listen to his mate’s words – he couldn’t betray him again. But he couldn’t stop hearing it, couldn’t get away.

“No thank you, no one asking me how I am. I get called when you need help figuring something out, and now that doesn’t even happen! I’m not even good enough for that! Danny is better at it then I am!” Derek ran out of the house, shifting fully into the wolf. Had to get away, get to Stiles – 

“the only thing I ever got was held hostage by Gerard and he kicked the shit out of me. And no one even asked what the hell happened – everyone was to worried about Jackson to care about that.”

He didn’t know. He hadn’t known. The wolf whimpered. He had failed, hadn’t protected his mate. His mate was hurt. 

“Erica and Boyd were there, and they never even mentioned it.”

He ran. He had to get away, get away from his mate’s voice. Far, far away.

“My dad doesn’t trust me, the rest of you act like I don’t even fucking exist.”

Derek howled. He couldn’t think that! Why would he think that?  
“Don’t say Scott misses me, he hasn’t been around me in months!”

Derek’s howl was echoed by another. Scott. 

“He’s too busy with you and Isaac to give a shit about me! So no Lydia, you’re right, I’m not fine.”

Not fine. Not fine at all. 

And it was Derek's fault. Derek was the one that pushed the boy away. Derek hadn't been able to stop Peter soon enough. If he had, Scott wouldn't have been bitten. Stiles never would have got involved in any of this. He and Scott would still be close, he wouldn't be...

It was all Derek's fault. And he couldn't do anything to fix it.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek acts weird. Stiles is confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry for the long wait. I've had horrible writers block and have been busy with school. Short chapter, but I hope you enjoy!

Stiles was sitting on his bed, head in his hands. The same position he had been in since the two girls left. He shouldn’t have said that. He shouldn’t have placed that on them. They didn’t need to know just how screwed up he really was. He should have kept his mouth shut.

A soft whine came toward him, muffled by the closed window. Stiles moved instantly, lifting his head and jumping to his feet, before he realized he didn’t have to open it. 

“Stiles,” Derek’s voice. Derek. Derek talking with a soft voice. A voice that sounded almost as broken as Stiles felt. So not Derek then.

“What?” Stiles asked hesitantly. There were so many possibilities here. It could be Derek. It could be an evil twin. A trick. Hell, as far as Stiles knew, this could be a dream. 

“Let me in,” Derek continued, his eyes meeting Stiles. Stiles froze. Derek always wore a mask. But the pain in his eyes…

“Are you hurt?” Stiles asked quickly, his mind flashing to Derek bleeding from multiple wounds. He moved toward the window, unlatching the lock.

Derek was in his room and wrapped around him before Stiles could even process he had moved. “What the-“

Stiles froze as Derek let out a high pitched whining noise and his arms tightened. Derek’s arms were wrapped around his waist, his face buried in the hollow between Stiles neck and shoulder. He was breathing deeply, still letting out the whining sound. 

Stiles mind was racing. What the hell was going on? “Derek?” Stiles asked hesitantly, moving his right hand up to rest on Derek’s back. He swallowed hard as his hand met pure muscle. “He big guy. Want to tell me what’s going on and why you’ve suddenly attached yourself to me?”

Stiles felt Derek shudder against him before taking another deep breath. “Stiles,” Derek whined, shaking his head against Stiles shoulder. Stiles free hand moved on its own accord, coming up to softly run through Derek’s hair. 

“Derek? You’re freaking me out a bit.” Stiles grimaced at the panic he heard in his own voice. How did he end up being the one comforting someone? How did he end up comforting Derek? 

“I didn’t do it. I told them not to. Don’t be mad. Don’t, don’t, don’t…” Derek continued to whine. 

Stiles continued to run his hand through Derek’s hair, but a fell over his face. “You’re going to have to be a bit more specific.”

“No, no, no, no…” 

“Just hold him for a moment, Stiles,” a silky voice broke in to Derek’s rambling. “He’ll be fine in a minute.”

Stiles turned his head toward the window quickly, making Derek let out a loud whine. Peter winced, but kept a smirk on his face as he looked at his nephew. “You’re going to be furious with yourself when you pull it together.” He informed him.

“What the hell is going on?” Stiles demanded, though his kept his tone light and his arms around the alpha werewolf. 

Peter chuckled lightly, “Unfortunately, that’s up to my nephew to tell you.” 

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Really?” 

Peter shrugged, his eyes moving back to the alpha. “Give it a few seconds.”

It didn’t take a few seconds. Derek stopped muttering and stiffened. Then he broke out of Stiles arms and moved backwards, his mask firmly in place. “Welcome back,” Peter chided. 

Derek flashed his eyes at his uncle, letting out a soft growl as he moved toward the window. Stiles moved in front of it instantly, his own eyes narrowed on the other man as he tried to ignore the feeling of loss that flooded his body as soon as Derek let go of him. “Oh, I don’t think so. What the hell was that?”

“Stiles, move,” Derek snapped, ignoring the chuckles coming from his uncle. 

“No. Not until you tell me what that was,” Stiles replied, folding his arms over his chest. This was absolutely ridiculous. 

Derek closed his eyes as if praying for strength, and when he opened them, Stiles saw resignation. “This should be interesting,” Peter commented lightly.

“Nuh uh. You, out.” Stiles demanded, moving away from the window and glaring at the laughing zombiewolf. 

Peter didn’t bother arguing, instead moving toward the window with a smirk across his face. “This should be fun.”

He disappeared out the window. Derek didn’t look at Stiles, instead he started walking in a small circle, letting out a small growl every few seconds. “Derek? Seriously, you need to talk. Now.”

Derek stopped. “Okay, maybe you should – should sit down.”  
Stiles raised an eyebrow. “Seriously?”

Derek pointed to the bed and Stiles sat with a huff. “Okay. Go.”

He didn’t go. Stiles watched as Derek once again started pacing. “Derek, seriously-“

“You’re my mate.”

Stiles stared. Those words could not have possibly – he couldn’t have just said – “What?”


End file.
